As a life coach, I take a different approach to love and life than other professionals. When it comes to finding love, you’re probably used to hearing advice telling you to put yourself out there, be present and be yourself. While that advice is valid, I like to take a more holistic approach to love. Love comes in many forms, and for Valentine’s Day, I’d like to encourage you to look at love with a little bit different perspective. Pay attention to and appreciate all of the different types of love in your life. Perhaps most importantly, show yourself some love this holiday, too.
We are taught from a very young age in our relationship with our parents that we should be mindful of how our actions make other people feel. Of course, showing kindness to others is important. But sometimes, we tend to push aside our own desires and instincts in favor of tending to someone else first.
Take Care of Yourself
This Valentine’s Day, I urge you to take care of yourself. Make it a point to show yourself some love for the benefit of your happiness and well-being. Once you focus on self-love, you may find that it positively impacts all aspects of your life from your romantic relationships to your professional career. In fact, you may find that the more you focus on what you want, rather than what you think you should do or what you think other people want you to do, you may find that dating becomes easier. You just might feel happier overall. The appreciation you feel for yourself, in the form of self-love, comes from actions you take to support your physical, spiritual, and psychological well-being and growth. Here are some steps you can take to show yourself some love:
– Become more aware of your thoughts and feelings, and act on this knowledge.
– Take good care of your basic needs, and practice healthy habits like exercising, eating well and sleeping well.
– Learn how to say, “no,” in your personal and professional lives.
– Don’t be too hard on yourself when you make mistakes.
Love Comes in All Forms
On Valentine’s Day, the focus is often put on romantic love. However, it’s important to remember that your life is filled with all different types of love, and each type deserves to be celebrated. Even if you go into Valentine’s Day single, and you’re feeling unhappy about that, take stock of all of the love in your life.
Consider All the Love You Can Have
The love you can have in your life may include:
– Love for yourself
– Love for and from your pets
– Love for your family
– Love for your friends
– Love of your job, home, hobbies, etc.
Claim Valentine’s Day as a day to celebrate all forms of love, not just romantic love.
Truths About Love
Love and relationships are often romanticized on Valentine’s Day, but in everyday life, love isn’t always about roses and chocolates.
Get the Facts
Here are some hard truths about love and relationships:
– Yes, love takes work. However, love shouldn’t fill you with self-loathing, grief, depression, or confusion.
– Partners need to love each other, but they also need to love themselves. A lack of self-love can ruin a relationship.
– On the flip side, other people can make you happy, and you should let them. They can also inspire you, ignite you and make you feel fulfilled.
– Always keep hope. There is a plentiful amount of love and partnership opportunities waiting for you out there.
– Yes, there is such a thing of loving someone but not being in love. You have to decide if that is enough.
– There can be more than one soul mate out there for you. The loss of one doesn’t mean you will never have a great love relationship again.
Navigating the Dating World
If you are just starting to see someone, or if you’re ready to jump back into the dating pool this Valentine’s Day, some helpful advice can make a difference.
What to Keep in Mind
– If your date isn’t going too well, instead of checking out, try learning something from the other person. Even if the chemistry isn’t there to start, you may still make a great connection.
– Remember that you are amazing on your own and as who you already are. If you start to feel like you’re losing yourself in a relationship, it’s time to re-evaluate the situation.
– Just like you should remain true to yourself, you need to accept your date as he or she is, as well. Don’t think that the other person will magically change as things progress, and don’t try to force any changes.
– Are things starting to get serious? Introduce your date to your friends. Your friends can give you an honest opinion, and they will still be there for you if things don’t work out in your dating life.
Show yourself some love, remain true to yourself, and focus on all of the love in your life to enjoy this Valentine’s Day to the fullest.
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